Recent News

"Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." John F. Kennedy;

"The best security against revolution is in constant correction of abuses and the introduction of needed improvements." Richard Whately;

I would remind you that extremism in the defense of liberty is no vice. And let me also remind you that moderation in the pursuit of justice is no virtue." Barry Goldwater.

As far back as 2000 FaFNY was advising government official and policy makers that the parental grief syndrome (a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder) which is exacerbated by the continued persecution of non custodial fathers was driving a fringe element over the edge. First it was suicide by those that saw no hope for the future (The Last Will and Testament of A. T. Renouf) but increasingly it was a murder-suicide. Many even turned the internal anger outward at the public at large (Could Family Dissolution be the Cause of the DC Sniper). We advised that the wholesale persecution of a large portion of the American Male population was bound to hit upon those who would set aside any remorse at acting out against others in a violent fashion. Indeed, the abuses are so severe that one could easily justify extreme reactions, and it is only by the individual restraint of law abiding men who seek peaceful redress for their grievances instead of lashing out that we have not seen more violence in response to the violent destruction and persecution of individuals (Violence Against Men, Methods of Control). Of course, instead of recognizing the stress and impact the system had on the people it was easier to blame the radical fathers and their "propensity toward killing themselves of others (Rights and Responsibilities).

Of course, at no time did FaFNY advocate for violence of any sort. Indeed, by working within the system we were giving people an outlet for their anger, a means to address their grievances. Sadly, the death of overwrought individuals due to parental grief and systemic persecution continued (SUICIDE POLICE CHIEF SOUGHT HELP). Society did, in fact it still does, consider it acceptable for a man to have to suffer a divorce against his will (often by an adulterous wife), false allegations of being abusive and violent, the removal of his children from him without cause, displacement from his home, invasion of his private papers and possessions, and the plundering of his assets. In response we'll send him to "parental education" classes to learn to get over it and we'll send him to anger management classes to teach him accept his "inappropriate anger" and publicly admit his "propensity to violence". Once done we'll extort his income in the form of a child excise tax (child support) paid to government for the children he isn't allowed to have a relationship with save for a scant few "visits" under the "standard NY Order" of every other weekend. In the face of all this violence against descent men and good fathers, FaFNY acted as a moderating force advocating for social and political change through advocacy and education.

Unfortunately the correction of the constant abuses was not forthcoming. There have been no needed improvements. In a meeting with Dan Conviser, Counsel to Assembly speaker Silver, he lamented the "radical" and "aggressive" behavior of those advocating for family court reform. I pointed out to him that this was the behavior of many prior to FaFNY taking on the legislative initiatives in NY. Unfortunately, for the past 10 years the NYS legislature has given us nothing, the NYS Executive (Governor and his agencies) have given us nothing and the NYS Courts have given us nothing save for ignoring our please for reform, ignoring our grievances for the violations of our civil rights. Indeed, any who advocate for reform are labeled as "radicals" themselves based upon the action of others. I advised him that due to the inaction of the legislature at any reform, for the past 30 years, we at FaFNY were unable to rein in any others who felt a more radical response was in order. Simply, when we went to others and asked for restraint they asked, "what has it gotten you these last 30 years?" Silvers staff said we were making headway, we had gained a great deal. I pointed out that in the past 12 years as "we were making headway", my children have grown up. It is hollow solace to be making headway when you watch your family destroyed for no reason. I advised that I am lord of myself only and not accountable for the actions of any other individual. Additionally, FaFNY is lord of the individuals who make up this organization only and not responsible for the actions of other organizations or individuals. I advised that I expect the radical responses from the fringe element to continue, additionally seeing no other recourse, the response of moderate individuals would become more radical. This is a statement of fact that exists regardless if you advocate for or against it.

In keeping with our desire to point out the extreme nature of the problem, the problem caused by a long train of abuses of our individual parental and civil rights by the hand of our own government and our patient suffering from watching our children grow up without us (and in suffering all the while) while this same government does not address these grievances we have reasonably shown to be true and accurate, we added the quote above from John F. Kennedy (hoping that the words of this Democrat Icon would have an impact) and some of the other quotes above. We also continued to send, not individually but to government officials en mass, stories of excessive abuse by individuals in response to their excessive persecution. One such distribution, by FaFNY VP Randall L. Dickinson, of the shooting of a Family Court Judge in Nevada resulted in Mr. Conviser reporting FaFNY and Dickinson to the NYS Police for investigation for "violent and threatening" correspondence. The investigation revealed no crime (indeed the investigator was embarrassed by being sent out for such a trivial matter which had no apparent basis in a violation of law). Charles A. Lindberg stated, "A radical is one who speaks the truth." We then will accept the radical label for in this we continue to tell the truth. We do NOT accept the "violent" label however, for unlike those who used the violence and power of government to destroy our families, we here at FaFNY are men and women OF the U.S. Constitution and are bound by our belief in equality to use those means of social and political change outlined in this great piece of work. We are better men and women than those who label us against our will and contrary to our actions violating our civil rights for their own personal gain.

We here at FaFNY do NOT condone violence (civil disobedience of unjust laws is OK if that is your avenue of protest). We work for social and political change and will exercise our individual right to change our "representative" government through the ballot box. We will continue to send notices of the abuses of the extreme which are in response to the abuses of the extreme actions of government. We close with the quote of Richard Whately, "The best security against revolution is in constant correction of abuses and the introduction of needed improvements" and the statement of Mr. Randall L. Dickinson, FaFNY VP to the NYS Matrimonial Commission:

In closing, I would like to leave you with the following thoughts to consider in the privacy of your own hearts and minds, away from all the sound and the fury, late at night perhaps, when you’re all alone with nothing else but your own consciences as company. If nothing else I’ve had to impart to you here today has got your attention, you need to hear me now loud and clear.

The event from which our Nation was born some 225 years ago was a revolution fought over the issue of taxation without representation. Many are beginning to develop an ominously similar perspective with respect to the issue of being stripped of their right to raise their own children without the interference of the state and/or its courts and being left with nothing but the responsibility for their financial support …, as determined by the state and/or its courts.

The issues and concerns you are hearing here today are themselves the stuff of revolution. You are sitting on a time bomb – a powder keg set to explode at any moment. Don’t take my word for it, though. I invite you to step out of the comfort and complacency of the boxes that appear to have insolated you for so long, and begin informing yourselves by taking even the most cursory look at the volume of discourse and the level of outrage being expressed over them on the internet.

Let me be very clear on this one point: in no way does The Coalition of Fathers and Families New York, Inc., condone acts of violence. We certainly would never endorse, promote, and/or encourage any such behavior. At the same time, however, we have no control over those who may be otherwise disposed, and you cannot continue to mistreat and abuse an entire demographic of any population the way non-custodial parents have been and continue to be, without sooner or later leaving the clear and distinct impression that they have no other alternative than to lash out in anger and rage. Even more dangerous, however, is to leave them with the sense that they have nothing to lose by doing so!

For those who may be tempted to discount my comments as hyperbole, make no mistake about it; there will be a price to pay for continuing to ignore these issues. You’d better hope to God - or to whomever or whatever you place your faith in - that your accounts are settled in this lifetime. Rest assured that, no matter how dear the cost, it will pale in magnitude to the debt likely to be collected in the next.

Ladies and gentlemen, you have a problem on your hands, larger, perhaps, than you might initially have imagined. You’d better start finding a way to fix it.